Things you will never understand

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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby Seatallan » May 4th, 2018, 9:51 am

Quitting smoking was by far the hardest thing I've ever done. I don't think I'd ever be tempted to smoke again just because the thought of having to go through it all for a second time is too awful...
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby Gruney » May 4th, 2018, 11:59 am

Seatallan wrote:Quitting smoking was by far the hardest thing I've ever done. I don't think I'd ever be tempted to smoke again just because the thought of having to go through it all for a second time is too awful...


Snap! It's been 44 years now, and I can still vividly remember the nightmares where I'd started again - they were so real. I used to wake up, unbelievably ashamed of myself that I'd started again - and then totally relieved that I hadn't.

I also remember the day I knew I'd cracked it. I was in a pub in Gloucestershire, where I lived at the time, and someone was offering the fags around - without thinking I said "no thanks, I don't smoke". Up until then I'd been saying " no thanks I'm trying to give them up". Only an ex smoker will understand how that felt.
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby TeresaFoodie » May 4th, 2018, 12:55 pm

Sea :kneel: Gruney :kneel: and anyone else who has been able to give up the nicotine :kneel: I am unable to understand any true addiction, can just take your word for it that it must be awful giving it up. My mum started aged 11, now 73. She did give up in the late nineties around the time that her parents gave up due to health reasons. I then broke up with my husband and she started again, put it down to stress of my situation, almost blamed me! My sister vowed never to smoke, started in her thirties, blamed the stress of her job. My 15 year old nephew now smokes...... :sad: Growing up in a household where every adult smoked, it put me off for life (see previous passive smoking thread!) and I've been grateful for that smoke filled upbringing because through all the stresses I have had in my life not once have I been tempted to start.

Incidentally, today I had to queue up in Tesco for a total of around 20 minutes to return a 65p bottle of dark soy sauce because the lid was faukty. Reason being, customer service is now mainly people buying tobacco and throwing their money at the National Lottery. :lol:
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby Ratatouille » May 4th, 2018, 1:14 pm

We both smoked during our student days and until our first child was due but started again after the second. Mr R particularly loved a good cigar and he says he still has a fancy for one sometimes. I didn't smoke at work but parties and Chhristmas saw me with a black Russian or a More. The minute we stepped off the ferry in France we had to stop for a pastis and a Gitane.
It was the children who told us they didn't like us smoking, so we both gave up but every time I had a pastis I craved a Gitane. It took me ages to get over it. I still haven't got over the pastis. ;)
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby StokeySue » May 4th, 2018, 1:28 pm

I did a few things to make it easier - if out I drank a very light dry white wine, as to me that didn't go with cigs, as other drinks would have done - a pastis would certainly have triggered a craving - and when on holiday on the med, the after lunch espresso in the sun, possibly with a little brandy, really felt a bit wrong without a cigarette for ages and ages. Trouble is I think I occasionally replace the cig with the digestif - just want more than the coffee itself still :oops:
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby Zosherooney » May 4th, 2018, 2:24 pm

National Lottery is gambling.......Don't understand it..... :|
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby Gruney » May 4th, 2018, 2:27 pm

I don't think it ever fully leaves us, Sue. A couple of months ago, a chap sitting by me in the pub was rolling a fag - Golden Virginia - I could smell it. Just for a second, I wanted one - I mean I really wanted one.
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby TeresaFoodie » May 4th, 2018, 6:47 pm

My mum still rolls her own from Golden Virginia. :sprout:
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby earthmaiden » May 4th, 2018, 8:04 pm

Zosh - the Lottery is gambling but with the knowledge that if you don't win some of the money will be used for a 'good cause'. This justifies the initial spend for many who still get the thrill of the chance of being one of the higher prize winners. It's like a dream ticket to a new life. My mother always reckoned that if you put the money away each week you'd soon be rich. At that time you'd have accrued £52 a year plus interest - and forfeited the chance to be a millionaire and help charities. I don't often do the Lottery but u less you go crazy with it - as some do - I think it6 quite fun.
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby WWordsworth » May 4th, 2018, 8:26 pm

I buy a ticket sometimes in the vain hope of bringing on earlier retirement.
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby Herbidacious » May 4th, 2018, 9:35 pm

I bought one once when it first started.
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby aero280 » May 4th, 2018, 9:46 pm

The church quiz night gives out a lottery ticket to each of the winning team. No one claims to be rich.
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby StokeySue » May 4th, 2018, 10:50 pm

My Dad simultaneously won the Premium Bonds and the Lottery in its first week. Gross winnings £35
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby Herbidacious » May 4th, 2018, 11:06 pm

I have £3 worth of premium bonds - my grandmothers Christening present (my older sister got £5 worth from her!) I have never won anything. Sister won £50 back in the late 70s which was quite a lot, especially as sister was only about 15 at the time.
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby TeresaFoodie » May 4th, 2018, 11:24 pm

I won £10 on the first UK national lottery draw. I used a series of numbers which I concocted somehow from family birth dates. I still remember the numbers which I then became obsessed with using every week thinking I would keep winning. I never did, although a few years later, desperate to get a flat of our own rather than living in shared house situations, myself and partner at the time got five numbers one Saturday, could have also been the bonus, or we were one digit away from it or from getting all six. We got around £1400 which we put down as a deposit on a rented flat. Not long after that we won the final game at Mecca bingo on holiday in Blackpool, about £300 I think. Handy! I haven't partaken in either gambling zones since, consider myself lucky to have had these amounts of money coming in just at the right time, and knowing that the lottery was helping a good cause made it seem ok to do it! I had another partner obsessed with scratch cards although he never won. I didn't understand that.
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby uschi » May 5th, 2018, 7:15 am

I think it has to do with certain things tickling the "reward centre" in our brains.
Many games do that, as does gambling or other habits.
I knew what addiction was even as a child. Both my parents smoked and my mother found it really hard to give up until she had the mother of all chest infections.
Papa found it a bit easier and once he got off the daily smokes, he turned into a party smoker.
I had the habit of using a muslin nappy (clean, of course) as a pacifier every night and sometimes during the day, too. That, and playing with my hair (grabbing the ends to form a small "brush" and listening to the sound it makes against my fingernails or skin) made the world a better place for me.
I managed to fight to keep the nappy habit until I was eleven and my mother threw them away. I could not sleep for days.
But it made me realise that if I could get hooked like that on something without any addictive substances in it, then smoking, alcohol or drugs were dangerous places for me to go.

OK, I enjoy some wine now and then, but I monitor it carefully.
As for smoking, it smells and has no appeal.
Gambling, I mustbe careful. I have bouts of intensive game-playing on the computer, but luckily there are many other things to interest me.
I used to love gambling in English sea side resorts. So much fun to play the penny pusher or whatever. But I always gave myself a limit, moneywise and gave any machine at home a wide berth. That way it was tied to something unusual and could not form a habit. :kneel:

BTW, I am still playing with my hair. It looks strange, but it gives me peace and contentment, so I don't see why I should break with such a cheap and harmless habit. :lol:
Let the others laugh, the only damage it does is to my hair. :lol:
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby Herbidacious » May 6th, 2018, 7:17 am

I sniff my hair when I am anxious. I used to do it a lot more than I do now. Having ti tied back rather got me out of the habit, I think. I also seem to put my right hand on my left shoulder. I am not sure if it's anything to do with this, but when i was little, I used to put my hand on my mother's shoulder (presumably when she was sitting down or holding me!).
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby Grasshopper » May 6th, 2018, 8:32 pm

I don't drink at all - not against booze, but I just don't, even though I have indulged very rarely.
Smoking - OMG :sprout: I don't think I could even START - the smell! :o
Illegal drugs - NO!
I eat too much and I swear, tho :lol:

Uschi - if you want to fiddle with your barnet, you go ahead. Your're not hurting anyone ;)
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby TeresaFoodie » May 6th, 2018, 8:37 pm

The thought of illegal drugs makes me feel physically sick! I can't watch certain scenes in some films because i would throw up. There can be absolutely no positive side to taking them. I wonder if people tempted to try them have never, sadly, had the fortune to experience a natural high.
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby uschi » May 6th, 2018, 9:20 pm

Grassy, you had me worried there. I do know some rhyming slang, but barnet for hair was a new one for me. You had me worried for a second there. ;) :lol:
I am glad I kicked the nappy habit, though. :lol:
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby Herbidacious » May 6th, 2018, 9:48 pm

My sister had what she called a sucky blanket until she was in her mid teens. It was a piece of viscosie nylon that she sniffed while sucking her thumb. By the time of it's demise it was more hole than material. It smelled horrid!

Tezza, I have never done hard drugs, and nor do I intend to, but I suspect a drug related high is not really comparable to a 'natural' one, although not quite sure what you mean by that, now I think about it! If it were, people would doubtless get addicted to natural highs too.
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby TeresaFoodie » May 6th, 2018, 10:31 pm

I'll try to explain better, Herb. There was a time in my life, the first time (there have been times since!) when I was in such company that I could have easily succumbed to the temptation of cannabis, but I was at that time the happiest i had ever been in my life (partner, job, home, car etc) so went against the offer. I could see some associates were quickly moving from cannabis to harder stuff, I could see where something seen as fun could potentially lead to something not so fun! Just last year, at rock bottom, again I encountered a similar situation, only this time a hard core drug dealer, starting off asking me in for coffee through very demented eyes whilst swaying on the spot, when he realised I knew what he was up to and started to keep my distance, he got nasty. I'm now well away from anything like that, thank God!

I think what I am trying to say is, I have known complete and utter happiness, a natural high, not just at the time of my first near brush with cannabis, but before I lost my job when I had everything I had worked hard to achieve, and I'd rather put my time, effort and money into feeling like that again than to fall down at the hands of any drug dealer! Not sure that I have actually explained that any better, sorry if not!

On the subject of comforting things, both my nephews had a favourite teddy as babies which they were allowed to keep until they were literally falling apart. Not so long ago youngest was walking about with something in his hand. It was a filthy thread of fabric which from a distance I could smell. It was his teddy. He wouldn't let my sister wash it in case it disintegrated completely. Yuck! :lol:
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby uschi » May 7th, 2018, 5:15 am

I hasten to add that my muslin nappy was one of about a dozen which were on duty on rotation, so I got a fresh one every day.
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby Herbidacious » May 7th, 2018, 7:45 am

Drugs and alcohol give you an instant and intensive hit. That's why they are addictive and partly why they are attractive. More stable long term happiness requires work, forward thinking, patience etc. and of course some people struggle to attain it even then. We are programmed to seek instant rewards. It''s partly what makes us work as humans - what helps us to learn quickly. It's an evolutionary advantage that has some very dark downsides. I imagine there are very many reasons why people try drugs knowing that they are addictive (or indeed abuse alcohol to the point of addiction and dependence.) But I imagine that a thought that goes through people's heads is that they will be the exception - they will not become addicted. Of course, it takes a lot longer to become addicted to some drugs such as alcohol and cannabis and it's certainly not inevitable, so in those cases, this sort of thinking is not delusory.
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby TeresaFoodie » May 7th, 2018, 8:06 am

Addiction / dependency - a very complex subject indeed!

With regards to comforters, I didn't have a physical one but I did have many named imaginary friends until my sister was born. I still have my mum's comforter, Humpty. She had him until her brother was born, then when he was old enough they used to fight over him.

Introducing Humpty. :lol: (sorry, sideways! Grr!)
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby StokeySue » May 7th, 2018, 8:20 am

That's a proper comfort toy Teresa!

This is mine, Teddy, he has a vinyl nose which I used to suck like a dummy, must be tough. I've had him since my first Christmas, my aunt bought hime because he is machine washable, a new concept in 1954, and she though it was brilliant
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby Herbidacious » May 7th, 2018, 8:21 am

Aw... :)

I found Daddy's rabbit when I was last at my mother's:

41047466345_917b3864c8_z.jpg


'Born' c. 1932. Sadly I don't know his name, and I don't my mother will remember.
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby Herbidacious » May 7th, 2018, 8:25 am

We should have a childhood toys thread...?

This is Bluebell, who is slightly older than me.

My mother knitted her dress back in '67...

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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby TeresaFoodie » May 7th, 2018, 9:19 am

Loving the idea of a childhood toys thread, seeing as I guess most of us will 'understand' them? :grin: Who'll do the honours?

Bluebell is cute!
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby scullion » May 7th, 2018, 10:54 am

it looks like your teddy is a wendy boston one, like mine, although mine is blue, (is a year older than me as it was given to my brother when he was born then passed to me when i was given none at birth). i wasn't a teddy cuddled or comfort sucker so it's in reasonable nick other than being re-stuffed. (the original chopped foam stuffing went when i was about ten. after having another re-stuff recently, i have taken a pattern off it and made others for friends children. i like the fact that it has a "bum'.
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby Herbidacious » May 7th, 2018, 10:58 am

Yes a Wendy Boston. I guess that's partly why she's in such good nick. Although I wasn't an ear dragging type. I treated her like a living thing i.e. with great care (and love.) My other teddy, bought when my grandfather died when I was four with some of the money he left my mother (not very much of it!) who is a bit threadbare.

I have a some-time recurring nightmare about her, that there are lots of WB teddies and I am bot sure which is Bluebell. I think this was triggered by a friend having one too. I hope your comment doesn't set me off again ;)
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby scullion » May 7th, 2018, 11:06 am

don't worry, blue ted is - pale blue - (so obviously a boy) so no chance of getting mixed up. oh, yes, the only defect of blue ted is that one eye had lost the glass bit before i can remember. there's just the metal stud centre left - and has never worn a dress - or anything!
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby PatsyMFagan » May 9th, 2018, 8:42 am

Herbidacious wrote:I have £3 worth of premium bonds - my grandmothers Christening present (my older sister got £5 worth from her!) I have never won anything. Sister won £50 back in the late 70s which was quite a lot, especially as sister was only about 15 at the time


My sister won £100,000 on the premium bonds ... I felt I may as well cash mine in as the chances of me getting a big win must surely be greatly diminished ? :rolleyes: :geek: :ugeek:
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby earthmaiden » May 9th, 2018, 8:59 am

I've had 2 since 1955. Never had a penny from them .. but you never know! I think if you only have £2 or £3 worth it's worth hanging on in case!
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby StokeySue » May 9th, 2018, 9:54 am

PatsyMFagan wrote:My sister won £100,000 on the premium bonds ... I felt I may as well cash mine in as the chances of me getting a big win must surely be greatly diminished ?

Statistically unchanged, ERNIE treats all bonds independently. Never fedls that way though! :)
My Dad had quite a few, I thought he'd sold them but fortunately he got a £25 win so I traced them and got the bonds cashed in, thought about hanging on to them, but there are limits to transfering them, had to have the fadh paid into Mum's account
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby Grasshopper » May 9th, 2018, 7:35 pm

uschi wrote:Grassy, you had me worried there. I do know some rhyming slang, but barnet for hair was a new one for me. You had me worried for a second there. ;) :lol:
I am glad I kicked the nappy habit, though. :lol:


Uschi - Barnet Fair = hair.
I've got bookfulls of slang words. (Is there anything I DON'T have a book on?) :lol:

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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby suffolk » May 9th, 2018, 9:05 pm

I go to a hair salon called Barnet & Figs
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby StokeySue » May 10th, 2018, 11:00 am

Surely that should be Barnet and Syrup? Always [a wig] syup from syrup of figs :lol:

Things I will never understand -Julia Somerville's back combed barnet, it's currently higher than my cousin's beehive circa 1964
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby uschi » May 11th, 2018, 11:57 am

Thanks everyone!
It's a few decades now since I first heard about rhyming slang, but I do like to keep on top of it. :lol:
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby TeresaFoodie » May 11th, 2018, 12:29 pm

StokeySue wrote:
Things I will never understand -Julia Somerville's back combed barnet, it's currently higher than my cousin's beehive circa 1964


Is she one of the presenters on Rip Off Britain on BBC1 in the mornings? I was looking at her hair this morning thinking I quite like it...
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby StokeySue » May 11th, 2018, 12:48 pm

TeresaFoodie wrote:s she one of the presenters on Rip Off Britain on BBC1 in the mornings? I was looking at her hair this morning thinking I quite like it...

Yes, she is the quiet one
I think the height of the back comb varies, on the morning I commented it was so teased out it was slightly see through and made her head about 1.5 times its natural length
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby TeresaFoodie » May 11th, 2018, 2:32 pm

:lol: I missed that elongated head episode! :lol:
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby TeresaFoodie » May 11th, 2018, 2:44 pm

Not so much a thing I will never understand, more a thing I can't currently understand. The fashion trend lately which I have mainly been seeing worn by female TV presenters. Blouses with one small motif, usually a bird or a butterfly, repeated over the entire garment, like this:

http://www.next.co.uk/style/st284048#575513

I'm not one for following the crowd which is probably why I don't get why everyone seems to be wearing them. Most are not even that attractive IMO.
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby suffolk » May 11th, 2018, 3:33 pm

I've got a navy one with swallows on ... had it a few years now ... Ma said she liked it ... it's the first time I can remember her ever saying she liked what I was wearing so I wore it for her funeral :)
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby liketocook » May 12th, 2018, 6:45 pm

Oh I must be on trend without realising it :D , I've at least two tops that fit the bird or butterfly repeated print and both are a good few years old. One is dark grey with light grey butterflies and the other is turquiose with navy flying seagulls (I think) on it. Away from bird/butterfly I also have a pale blue linen one with white poppies on it which is a least 10 years old....
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby karadekoolaid » May 13th, 2018, 12:18 am

Grasshopper:
Uschi - if you want to fiddle with your barnet, you go ahead


That´ll put a Sandy Lyle on yer boat, innit? :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

I worked with Charlie, a true East-ender, when I was at university in New Cross. Picked up loads of rhyming slang; and it was a huge source of amusement when I started teaching EFL. In fact, I used to use it to teach foreign students how not to worry about new vocabulary; just work it out from the context.
Wow - have you just brought back some Dick Emerys! :lol: :lol: :lol:
" Bite off more than you can chew, then chew like Hell!"
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby StokeySue » May 13th, 2018, 12:49 am

The thing about rhyming slang is it changes quite rapidly
I remember, circa 1977, working with a man then about fifty. There was a minor crisis
Him: let me through - I'm the ginger beer! :D
Me: What do you think ginger beer rhymes with?
Him: Engineer
Me: Not any longer*
Him: :oops: :oops:
Both: :lol: :lol:





* in case it has changed again in the last 40 years, in 1977 it rhymed with queer
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby Zosherooney » May 13th, 2018, 6:34 am

Before I developed this T2D I used to have a Winnona Ryder quite often................Cider ! Whereas Mr. Z. would quench his thirst with a Brittany...... Spears ! Beer !!!!
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby TeresaFoodie » May 13th, 2018, 7:00 am

I was bought up on Cockney rhyming slang. Here, have a butcher's at this quiz. I got 9/10. Slightly annoyed at that! :lol:

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfr ... slang-quiz
I either win, or I learn
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Re: Things you will never understand

Postby earthmaiden » May 13th, 2018, 7:03 am

I'm not a Cockney and would really rather people used the proper words for things - perhaps with the exception of a few where the slang has become everyday language everywhere. Interesting about Barnet. Not something I'd heard until my children were at school when the Mullet hairstyle was fashionable and those who adopted the style would have the comment 'baaarnet' aimed at them. I had no idea it was a general term for hair.
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