Love you, hate your food.

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Love you, hate your food.

Postby Ratatouille » March 9th, 2019, 2:13 pm

I heard this programme on the World Service the other day and it really interested me. I'm not at all sure I could cope with such vast differences. Could/do you ?

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-47468193
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Re: Love you, hate your food.

Postby earthmaiden » March 9th, 2019, 4:19 pm

No, I couldn't. Having had relationships with people from my own country whose tastes did not match mine and from other countries where delicacies did not float my boat I think that to broadly agree about food is a very important factor. To meet someone from a different background and to be adventurous and learn together is a wonderful thing if most of the time the new experiences are a delight to both, whether in food, literature, music or anything else. I doubt that any couple will ever agree about everything and that's fine, but the added intimacy of enjoying sensory experiences together is part of the delight of the relationship and to have to deprive oneself of such an important one is an absolute no no to me, it creates too much disappointment in the long run.
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Re: Love you, hate your food.

Postby Ratatouille » March 10th, 2019, 10:39 am

Interesting isn't it. Only one of the 3 couple seems to have adapted and made compromises but it was the man who made them.
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Re: Love you, hate your food.

Postby Zosherooney » March 10th, 2019, 10:34 pm

I was brought up to finish my plate of food, Dad was strict and had a terrible time during WW2. I pushed the boundaries with food and M&D did travel some...... Of course the internet has opened up the world of food. Mr. Z (when I met him) was OK with a curry but his Mum told me, he would not eat mince...... He seemed to enjoy my chilli ? Since then he/we eat most things and will experiment with lots of different cultures and he is open to trying most stuff except offal and strong cheese... I think he would agree that our love of food in general has brought us together and most days, over our 1st T, the days menu is discussed.... :D
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Re: Love you, hate your food.

Postby WWordsworth » March 11th, 2019, 8:56 am

We do that as well Zosh, a cup of tea and decide the menu for the day.
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Re: Love you, hate your food.

Postby Ratatouille » March 11th, 2019, 9:45 am

And us - but in our case it is breakfast anf a coffee Mr R has to wake up which takes rather a long time.

Our Danish friends are interesting they have several dislikes but these are all different. Fortunately there are plenty of things they do both like, and quite a lot they both dislike - vegetables being one. These are more quirks than real differences.
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Re: Love you, hate your food.

Postby WWordsworth » March 11th, 2019, 10:02 am

I find it very odd that some people dismiss vegetables en masse, when there is so much variety.
My pal is one of them - "nothing green"
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Re: Love you, hate your food.

Postby Meganthemog » March 11th, 2019, 10:50 am

My OH was in the 'no veg' camp when we first married. However I have over the years got him to eat asparagus and raw peas and carrots. His mother and grandmother both boiled their veg until every last bit of texture and flavour had been beaten out of them.They really did put the sprouts on in the morning, boil them until they were soft - adding the teaspoon of bicarb - and then kept them warm in the hostess trolley until lunchtime :sprout:
He didn't know that veg could be served al dente and now prefers to eat them raw. He also didn't eat anything spicy until I gradually introduced him to the wonders of Middle Eastern and Indian cuisine - now he loves food with a bit of a kick.
I love the story of the Indian mother who is allowed to bring food for her son ' a few times a week'!
I know a vegan couple who had a real problem when her mother wanted to join them for Christmas lunch but wanted to bring a turkey.
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Re: Love you, hate your food.

Postby StokeySue » March 11th, 2019, 12:35 pm

My ex was West Indian and my late OH French
Never had much difficulty with food, possibly because I’ll have a go at cooking anything if I can find a recipe, I still cook a lot of Caribbean and Gascon dishes and that have a go attitude seems to be missing in the BBC couples. Both were pretty happy as long as given a full plate of food with nothing they already hated on it. I did have a bit of trouble working with OH who didn’t eat cheese or apples but not major.

I had more trouble with their female relatives
“But he must have <insert obscure stodgy dish here> it’s <insert obscure festival here>! “

“You can’t serve shepherd’s pie to a non-Brit” Shepherd’s pie being a favourite of both

Etc etc
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Re: Love you, hate your food.

Postby Zosherooney » March 11th, 2019, 10:15 pm

WW Mr. Z. says he has to know what is on the days menu so he can 'prepare' himself for it ! Yet, if we go out to eat, he gets no time to 'prepare' when looking at a menu then there it is on the table in front of him !

I think we all have days when you salivate for 'something' or read of someones plans on here and it sets you off wanting that food. I did that recently when Suff was talking of a ham joint in the SC. Well, I just had to do it !!!! Mine was £1.25 on the RTC counter and it went in the SC with some onions, garlic, 4 cloves, a smattering of sage, and some puy lentils and some small spuds. Guess what's for supper tomorrow night?
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Re: Love you, hate your food.

Postby Herbidacious » March 12th, 2019, 9:32 am

I went on a writing retreat a few years ago, and the owner of the house cooked two or three course meals every evening. There were only 6 of us including her, but one of the retreatees refused to eat most vegetables, fish and quite a few meats. Our host was exasperated (but it least it took the pressure of me as a vegetarian. We were in France, and quite near the sea, and she (English owner) liked to make the most of local and seasonal produce...)

OH and I have different leanings towards food - his leanings being more towards junk food ;) - and a lot of the things I really like, are not things he'd choose to eat. But he will eat them. Male compromise again, but then if cooking is done, it's me that does it. There are things I don't make, when he is around, which I'd like to.
He stopped eating meat (officially) about 18 years ago (not because of me) and has now said he is not going to eat fish, but the veggie/non-veggie thing has never been an issue. But as I said, I cook, he won't/doesn't so...
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Re: Love you, hate your food.

Postby WWordsworth » March 12th, 2019, 5:18 pm

J and I both enjoy cooking and we have different strengths.
Perhaps sterotypically, he cook roasts, steak or curry and I tend to do risotto, pasta, pastry, lighter casserole type stuff such as the chicken and lentil thing I will do tomorrow.

I am not very confident at cooking fish so J tends to do that, apart from salmon patia which is one of mine.
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Re: Love you, hate your food.

Postby TeresaFoodie » March 12th, 2019, 7:29 pm

I have been in relationships with chronic carnivores :lol: who wouldn't touch my vegan food with a barge pole but we both had respect for each other's choices enough that it wasn't a problem. Another where he saw the benefits of eating less meat and enjoyed doing so, which was great as we shared cooking and on the odd occasion he fancied a bit of steak he did that bit and I did the rest!

Diet choices never were an issue until I met someone a few years ago who would only eat about ten things. It was something I could not get my head round and didn't fully understand until we broke up which was when he told me he had Asperger's. I had no knowledge of the condition until that moment, and then lots of other things made sense too. Had I known in the beginning then things may not have worked out how they did, but the contrast in my interest in all things foodie and his complete safety net on the subject did cause a few arguments which, looking back, must have been quite painful for him, whereas it was merely a frustration for me, if only he had been up front, although I realise that may have also been difficult. I think I mentioned here before that I adore dried mango and out shopping one day I was munching some whilst walking back to the car with the trolley. I was going on and on at him 'Oh please try it, you really don't know what you are missing, so good!' He eventually tried a bit and promptly threw up in Tesco car park.

These days I don't have to compromise my (or anyone else's) food preferences and long may it continue.
Imagine peace
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