THE DAILY YOKE

Order yourself a latte, and a pastry (The virtual cinnamon buns are excellent today). And have a nice chat.

Re: THE DAILY YOKE

Postby Chinchilla_lady » February 12th, 2018, 5:47 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol: Well Done, made Mr C and me roar with laughter.
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Re: THE DAILY YOKE

Postby scullion » February 12th, 2018, 6:21 pm

love it.
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Re: THE DAILY YOKE

Postby TeresaFoodie » February 12th, 2018, 8:47 pm

Brilliant!
I either win, or I learn
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Re: THE DAILY YOKE

Postby Gruney » February 12th, 2018, 10:11 pm

Caesar and Brutus get tickets for the final.

Brutus doesn't turn up until half time.

"Sorry I'm late, Caesar - there was an accident on the way here - chariots all over the place. What's the score?"

" 8 - 2 Brute".
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Re: THE DAILY YOKE

Postby karadekoolaid » February 13th, 2018, 2:39 am

Two young ladies go to their favourite restaurant to have dinner.
The restaurant is packed and there are no tables available. Most of the tables are occupied by couples.
One of the ladies took her mobile and made a call.
Staring pointedly at the tables, and in a very loud voice, she said:
" HELLO, my dear friend!! I´ve just arrived at the restaurant and I noticed your husband sitting here with another woman! If I were you, I´d get down here as quickly as you can!"
ZAP!! 5 men ran out of the restaurant, and two more fainted.
7 free tables!!!
" Bite off more than you can chew, then chew like Hell!"
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Re: THE DAILY YOKE

Postby earthmaiden » February 13th, 2018, 7:24 am

:lol: :lol: .. reminds me of a time I was asked to take a publicity photo in a local wine bar mid afternoon. Before starting, I told the couples frequenting the chosen area what I was doing in case they didn't want to appear in the final photo ... there were some red faces - it is an effective way to clear a bar :lol: .
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Re: THE DAILY YOKE

Postby dennispc » February 14th, 2018, 9:40 am

Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties and had never been married. She was admired for sweetness and kindness to all.

One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea.

As he sat facing her old pump organ, the young minister noticed a cut-glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water. In the water
floated, of all things, a condom!

When she returned with tea and scones, they began to chat. The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer resist. "Miss Beatrice", he said, "I wonder if you would tell me about this?" pointing to the bowl.

"Oh, yes" she replied, "isn't it wonderful? I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground. The
directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven't had the flu all winter!"
Every day is a good day, it's just that some days are better than others.
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